What you about to read is posting I made to the P-shift Mailing list. I'm sorry for taking a year and a half to post this, but in the closing I'll explain why it took this long.
[The following was originally posted on the P-shift mailing list.]
"Lance Foxx's P-shift"
August 10, 1999
Sasebo, Japan
For those of you that either don't know or remember me, I am Lance Foxx, [23] of San Diego. I have been a dream shifting Were for many years and I've been on-line since '97. I have two phenotypes: wolf and fox. I do Were/Furry artwork, but I am definitly a lot more Were than Furry. I take my therianthropy very seriously and spiritually, but I'll admit it.
I've also become obssessed with p-shifting, but I've experinced being both a wolf and a fox so much that I just got tired of my dreams. They're just not enough because now, I wanted to experience it in real life as well.
I joined the Navy in '97 and my time online has become very limited. I've been offline for nearly a year now because of the Navy. Well, things are turning around now for the better and it looks like I may be back on-line soon as I will be getting my own computer.
Anyway, on to the heart of the matter.
About a year ago during June through August of '99, my ship was in Sasebo, Japan. What we were doing in Japan was trading one ship US Navy ship (the USS Juneau LPD 10) for another (USS Dubuque LPD 8, the one I'm on now).
While in Japan, I had a lot of time to myself and I enjoyed it. I spent a lot of time and money on-line, but even more time by myself on the ship. I camped out in an empty troop space where I had my own privacy. It was great, it was like having my own apartment in a way. No one bothered me and I could work on my artwork, stories, and p-shift attempts.
Everything began with this. When August came around, I remember I was going through a lot of what I call "Wild Shifts". I would feel so m-shifted that I just let it go and I'd do whatever I'd feel I had the urge to do. I found it hard to control and I gave into urges of growling, getting down on all fours, and allowing myself to simply act more canine.
Now, I did have control of it, just not complete control. I mean, I wouldn't allow it to happen in public or during work, but when I went back to the troop space at night, that's when I let it all go and I did things, canine things like growling and baring my fangs, that surprised me.
I had never had Wild Shifts before and I was a bit unnerved by it. I had always been in control of my shifting, even in my dreams. There's been times in my dreams I've been able to controlled the transformation and shifted exactly the way I wanted to. And during real life, I've never had trouble surpressing the wolf within me. But, when I moved back to that troop space, I allowed myself to let go for the first time and I was surprised at just how strong the urge was to do these things. It didn't scare me, but I was a bit uneasy with how strong it truly was, never realized how much I was holding back until I nearly howled a few times!
I would enjoy it, not really believing that it was neccassarily the beginning of a p-shift, and it would last for 5 to 15 minutes before the urge would go away and I would relax, stretch and stand back up.
Then, on the night of August 9th, the morning of August 10th, I woke up from a dream I'll never forget. The dream was not extraordinary, but I became lucid at the end of it and when I woke up what happened next WAS extraordinary.
In the dream I was in canine form. I couldn't tell if I was a wolf or a fox, but I was definitly canine. I had just got done doing something in the dream and I remember looking across a ditch and into some woods. My mind was thinking something along the lines of "Okay, what should I do now?" when I suddenly became lucid. I realized that I was canine and that I was dreaming.
My lucidity caused me to wake up and what happened next was the most incredible experience I have ever had in my life.
I awoke to the strange sensation that something was wrong with my left eye. I was lying on my right side, but almost face down. Waking up a bit, I reached up with my hand and touched the left eyebrow where the strange sensation was.
The bone structure felt different. The eye socket around my left eye had changed. The top portion, directly above the eye was a lot higher than normal. It made my the bone structure around the eye feel 50% bigger! I never woke up so fast in my life.
I paniced. Now fully awake, I continued to feel this and I completely freaked out. P-shifting was far from my mind. I thought I had somehow damaged my eye in my sleep by lying down in a funky position or something. I WAS nearly on my stomach. I thought maybe I had permanantly damaged the eye or something.
Quickly, I leaped from the bed and stumbled in the dark for a light and a mirror. All the while, I was continuing to feel the strange formation above my left eye.
Then, something remarkable happened. As I was actually touching it, it started to change back to normal! I felt the bone structure flow or morph back into it's normal shape! The was no pleasure, no pain, just an odd flowing sensation as I guess the bone structure softened and flowed and hardened back into it's normal shape. This happened while I was touching it with my hand and feeling it within my face. Now I was even more eager to find the light and the mirror.
I soon did, but by the time I reached the mirror, nothing looked out of the ordinary. I examined my face and the rest of my body closely, but nothing else had changed. I was completely human again.
After that, I stayed up the rest of the night. I got some water and sat up thinking about the whole experience, trying to make sure I remembered every little detail and I wrote it down, jotting it all down in notes and sketches. But, for the most part I just sat there in semi-shock and I could only think of one thing.
I had just p-shifted.
Later that day, the ship got underway for a test run. We tested out how our new ship did at sea and I tried not to think about what happened that morning. The work I had to do was very dangerous and it required my full attention and concentration, so I temporarily blocked out the previous night, at least until later that day when I had a moment to myself.
The first chance I got I was outside on the side of the ship. I had just got done painting and my working partner and I were packing up. As we did, I finally reflected on what happened that last night.
When I even slightly considered trying to p-shift again, a muscle suddenly spasmed in my face. Quickly, I covered my face and pretended to suddenly get a headache, because others still around working around me. I stayed calm.
The muscle that spasmed was that muscle on the side of my eye. You know that slight dip just to the side and behind your eye? That's the muscle, right next to where your sideburn would be. It suddenly grew tense on it's own and swelled up like a knot.
I didn't want to p-shift then because I wasn't truly ready for it, not so soon after the first shift, and especially with other people around. I didn't have the privacy.
I forced it down by saying, "No, no, no..." in my mind and it slowly went away, the muscle relaxing.
It's been a year since that day and nothing like that has happened since.
The truth is, I don't think I've been ready and comfortable enough in life to try again, so it hasn't happened.
But, now I AM ready and I've never been more comfortable. I'm ready to seriously get back into my p-shifting attemps again, but I just wanted to let you guys know about last year before anything else happens.
I've missed [you, my on-line friends] a lot and I hope that this will be the first of many post from me, definitly not as long, but hopefully more frequent once again.
Also, I've had a lot of trouble trying to write up this experience. I've tried and never been happy with it, so I just sat down and typed this all up in one long sitting. So, I hope I didn't bore, scare, or deter any one from me. I've been trying to p-shift for the longest time and although I'm fully aware that I didn't exactly change into a bi-pedal muscle bound werewolf, I did physically shapeshift and I believe I'm a step closer to acheiving my dream, the dream of experiencing what it's physically like to be a wolf or anthro-wolf in real life.
Thank you for allowing me to share my experience with you. I look forward to any response, from the disbelieving negative to positive and reassuring.
I do need feed back on this...
Again, thank you and sorry for it being such a long post. I hope it was clear and easy to read. Please e-mail me if I was unclear and you have any questions.
That's it. Take care and stay cool everyone!
NOCTURNALLY,
LANCE FOXX
P.S. I have talked with other Weres before about this and I know I discussed it in several Were chatrooms... not too many people in those chatrooms seemed to believe me and I don't blame you if you don't, but please... at least talk to me about this.
I assure you this is not made up. I truly experienced it and I believe the whole reason I am experiencing this is that I feel I will learn how to p-shift and I believe I'm supposed to help others achieve their dreams of doing the same. I'd like to believe that sharing information and experiences like this is exactly what this mailing is list is all about. : ]
In Closing
Written February 25, 2001
Okay, the reason I took so long to post this is that the responses I got from actually a lot of people in the Were Community is that I shouldn't post this and make it "public."
Although, I agree that it's a risk, I feel that my experiences are truly meant to be shared. I know there are so many out there that what to know how to p-shift so badly that it's a burning obsession. I know because I felt the same way ever since I first came to except my lycathropy in '94 and '95, back when I came to except that I, too, would like to p-shift.
It's frustrating, though, because so many p-shifters in the Were Community choose to keep to themselves and to their small circle of friends. I refuse to do that. I want to share my experience, and what limited knowledge I have, with all that are willing to listen.
The point was brought up that what if I teach someone how to p-shift that doesn't deserve it. Who am I to judge who is deserving or not? Besides, even though we're talking about physical shapeshifting, there is a spiritual side to this as well and I know that if someone doesn't deserve to p-shift, then they simply won't, no matter how hard they try.
To become, say, a wolf, you must accept the wolf into your heart. Hate, rage, jealousy, and all those other dark emotions cannot be a factor and if you try shifting with these things in your heart.
As for being a teacher, that's not what I'm setting out to do. I'm just another Were, one of the hundreds that seem to be out the now, and I'm just sharing my experiences. I cannot teach or guide anyone. The best I can hope for is that you read my experiences and somehow get inspired by them and have your own success.
So, despite the opposition I'm facing amongst some of my friends, I've decided to post this for your benefit. I feel obligated to, because I still feel that the reason I'm experiencing these things is to share my experiences and help other achieve their dreams as well.
As for what's next, I will continue trying to p-shift further, even more than ever now, and I will share all my experiences with you here on my website. Thank you and, until next update, take care! : ]
Two Previous and Related Experinces I Had
The Slip
The Second Slip?
My Latest Experience I Have Had
The Flow
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© 1997 Lance_Foxx@hotmail.com