Roger’s Deuce

            Roger was sitting in his vast living room staring at the off-white wall across from him. He was so bored with himself that even so much as an interesting thought could tear his mind away from the monotony he was facing. He thought about calling Sirus, or maybe Wex, to see if they wanted to come over and Jam on guitar or something, but then he remembered that Sirus was out camping with his Girlfriend, and Wex was probably off on some adventure at a theme park with his buddies trying to pick up some females. Then he thought he could call Pluto, but he wasn’t enthusiastic about hanging out with him and his boyfriend, all they would probably do is kiss each other and be all “lovey dovey” leaving Roger just as bored as before.

            Another thought crossed Rodger’s tiny brain. What about Jacqi? Maybe she can hang out, and knowing her I’ll pro’ly get laid in the process. Great idea Roge! Roger got up from his couch rather lethargically, leaving Hare Shaped indent in the leather couch. Trudging over to the phone, he grabbed his little black book out from his pocket. “Let’s see, 555- (cause ALL fictional numbers start with 555 for some damn reason) 4347. 555-4347.

            He heard the annoying ringing sound you get when you call somebody, it ran on for about 3 rings before somebody picked up.

            “Hello?” came a sugar sweet voice.

            “Hey, Jacqi?”

            “Yes this is her.”

            “Hey, it’s Roger. How are you?”

            “O hey! What’s up Roge? I’m great ‘n you?”

            “I’m good, a little bored though.”

            “Aww, I’m sorry bout that.” She said apologetically. “You want to come over and hang out with me and Sheila?”

            Great, I haven’t even said anything and this is already going my way! SCORE!! Thought Roger. “Um sure, I’ll be over in about, oh let’s say, half hour? Cause I gotta get some clean clothes on.” It was a lie. He just wanted to make sure he didn’t forget any of the necessary “Accessories.”

            “Ok then, we’ll see you when in half hour then. Love ya, bye.”

            “Late.”

            Roger hung up the phone and made a jump as if he’d scored the winning goal in a soccer game. He ventured across the vast living room, past the almighty TV, and totally ignoring his little pet Human, spike. Roger had just been given a mission. And he was going to see it through no matter what. He dug through his desk looking for the most valuable thing in existence (to him anyway). Papers flew this way and that, the loud *dink* sound a pencil makes when it hits the ground became plentiful.

            “A HA!! There you little bugger’s are.” Holding up the two shiny wrappers. “Trojan condoms, is there any other better rubber in the world?”

            Placing the two items in his wallet for safekeeping, he grabbed his leather jacket and his keys and made his way out to the driveway. He pressed the unlock button on his car alarm and waited for the double beep of the mechanism before opening the door. He stepped inside and turned on the Ignition. The radio went on announcing his favorite station: “You’re listening to The Ragna Rock, The greatest hits of all Rock n’ Roll new and old.”

            *                                                                      *                                                                      *

            *knock* * knock*

            “Who is it?”

            “Guess.”

            “O hey there Roger! Come in, Come in, we were just about to smoke a bowl.”

            “Without me? I hope not.”

            “Don’t be silly, we would’ve waited for you to get here.”

            “Oh sure, I believe you.” He said sarcastically.

            He marched on in with Jacqi following. They made their way around the house until they arrived at the dinning room. Sheila was sitting there with the bong in her lap, packing the weed in the bowl.

            “Hey there jack-rabbit.” Said Sheila.

            “Hey Sheila, what’s goin’ on?” Roger replied.

            “Just getting everything ready.” Roger and Jacqi had a seat at the small round table if front of them. Sheila was finished packing the bowl and was lighting up her first hit. The smell of marijuana soon became evident as she sucked in the smoke and released the carb. With a light “oh man that’s good” Sheila passed the bong to Jacqi. She repeated the process Sheila had set before them. Sheila by now had released what smoke she had in her lungs, and blew it up towards the ceiling. Jacqi passed the bong over to Roger. He took a really big hit out of the thing and set it down in the middle of the table. Sheila went for another rip, and Jacqi claimed the next one, Roger declined because he wanted to be sober enough to think about how he was going to get in both of their pants.

            “Why aren’t you having another hit Roge? Sheila asked.

            “Because that first one was huge.” It was a lame excuse, but it worked.

            “Ok suit yourself. Means more for me and Sheila.” Jacqi answered.

            A few bong rips later, Jacqi and Sheila had finished up the last of the weed. Alright, time to work my magic. Thought Roger. But first me gets something to satisfy me munchies. Apparently Sheila and Jacqi had the same idea, so Roger opted to get some Nacho Cheese Doritos (Da Cheesiest!) from the cupboard. First he “Detoured” to the bathroom and passed the thermostat. He turned it up ever so slightly, so that Sheila and Jacqi might be more willing to take of their clothes in the heat. When he returned he had the Doritos bag clenched at the bottom with the air pressure built up at the top. He popped the bag open and a few chips flew out of the bag.

            The three Hares started munching voraciously on the little cheesy triangles. Crunches could be heard throughout the whole house. Roger had noticed the heat started kicking in.

            “It getting hot in here” Sheila stated.

            “In more ways than one.” roger mumbled between Doritos.

            “Do you guys mind if I take off my shirt?” she asked

            “No” said Roger.

            “No,” said Jacqi, “Sounds like a good idea though.”

            Both girls soon sat in their Bras eating Doritos. “Aren’t you hot in that Shirt Roge?” They asked.

            “Yeah.”

            “Why don’t you take it off then?”

            “I don’t know.” Roger took off his shirt, revealing his toned abs.

            “You know Roge, you’re really cute.” Jacqi said.

            “Yeah.” Sheila seconded.

            Roger Blushed slightly, but he knew that the THC was getting to their pleasure centers. They were getting horny. Perfect. Sheila took off her Blue Jeans and came over and sat on Roger’s lap, wrapping her arms about his neck in a very sensual way. She kissed Roger on the cheek, as she came in to do it again, Roger turned his heat to meet her lips, she touched down and stuck her tongue down his throat. Jacqi had gotten up and was walking towards the two. She got down on her knees and thrust her hand down Roger’s pants. She started to fondle his penis, massaging it as it started to become erect. Roger’s hands were maneuvering up and down Sheila’s lower back as she stood up and leaned in still kissing him. He delicately undid the back of Sheila’s bra and pulled it off. Her tits were some of the most beautiful he had ever seen. Jacqi persisted to fondle Roger’s penis. Roger had a better idea, and he stood up and motion for them to follow him, they all finally ended up on the floor in the living room. The shag carpet felt good on their furry skin.

            Jacqi unbuttoned Roger’s fly, and pulled off his pants and boxers revealing his fully erect cock. She guessed it to be about 7 1/2 inches. She gripped his cock with her hand and slowly massaged it and gave it light kisses. Sheila Finally pulled away from Roger, who still had his tongue out. She got up and squatted over Roger’s face, her beautiful pussy right in front of his face. He started to thrust his tongue into her, Moans of pleasure emulated from her. His tongue moved in different directions, tasting the sights, rubbing against this wall, lightly batting at the clitoris, and going inside her once again.

            Jacqi kissed his cock, she kissed it everywhere on the shaft, she licked the foreskin and put her lips around it, she began to move up and down the shaft, dragging her teeth ever so slightly on the skin, creating a tickling sensation inside Roger. His precum shot into the back of Jacqi’s throat, the taste was wonderful. She sucked his cock with the power of a five speed vacuum, she could hear his moans of pleasure between the slurps he made while eating out Sheila.

            Jacqi stopped sucking on his slippery penis and got up on her knees. She kneeled over Roger’s abdomen and leaned back onto his cock. Slowly she descended onto the foreskin, her pleasure center started to climb. She slid farther down onto the shaft; her wet pussy was slightly tight on his cock, the shaft and foreskin rubbing on her walls as they gripped it. It felt like a dream. Sheila looked at Jacqi; she looked so hot right now. Jacqi caught Sheila’s gaze, and had the same thoughts. Sheila leaned inwards towards Jacqi, and Jacqi did likewise. Sheila stuck out her tongue, meeting up with Jacqi’s. Their tongues wrestled each other, trying to push the other in the opposite direction. Jacqi’s lips caught Sheila’s and they proceeded to tongue wrestle. The tongue rings making an interesting “clack” when they hit.

            Meanwhile, Jacqi’s hips are moving slightly and slowly down to the bottom of Roger’s penis. The sexual pleasure is incredible, Jacqi moves her hips upward, Roger’s foreskin widening her pussy ever so slightly, tickling her. His tongue was creating the same emotion inside of Sheila’s warm, wet pussy. Roger felt Jacqi’s pussy contract tighter than before, she was approaching her climax. A mumbled “Mmmphh” sound found its way out from between Sheila and Jacqi’s mouth, proving Roger correct. Jacqi finally Climaxed and was squeezing Roger’s cock so much he couldn’t move. He felt her pussy juice swarm over him, finally she relaxed and released her death grip on him. He still hadn’t climaxed though, so he went on to keep on fucking her.

            Finally, Roger felt an orgasm coming. He clenched his muscles and tried to hold it in as much as possible, Sheila Climaxed a second before he did, showering his face with a wonderful tasting liquid. Roger finally burst inside of Jacqi, his cum flowing up into her. All three rabbits let out moans of exhaustion and pleasure. Jacqi got up off of Roger’s throbbing cock, she dripped all over him, and fell down on the floor. All three just lay there and stared at the ceiling. All of them still remotely high, the ceiling rippled as if it was liquid. Suddenly, Roger remembered something.

            “Oh SHIT! We forgot the condom!” he said in remembrance.

            “Oh don’t worry. We didn’t forget our pills this morning.” Sheila explained.

            “Wha?”

            “Birth control, silly. We’ve been on the stuff for about a year. You won’t give us any kids.”

            “Thank God. Man do I have the munchies again.”

            “Ditto, put on some clothes and go get us some more Doritos.”

            “Sure no problem.” Roger put on his black jeans and made his way over to the kitchen.

            “Oh, by the way,” Jacqi said. “turn the thermostat back down, it’s too hot.”